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Small Change
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Herself and Buzz on the ferry to Montauk, where she and Karl spent a month every summer in a little cabin. Now that she’d retired from the phone company, they could go for the whole summer.

A volunteer — a different one than yesterday’s — gave her the interview, and in a matter of minutes, she sat in a small outdoor enclosure.

Although the rain had stopped, the ground remained soaked. Buzz seemed careful about getting his paws wet. A good sign. The girl must have kept him indoors. He nosed around, made his mark on a fence post, then came to her.

“Hello again,” she said.

He sat. She held out her palm. He sniffed, then laid his cheek on it, and slid it up to his ears.

“Oh, so you like your ears rubbed?” Marian obliged.

She noticed then how white his muzzle was, and his prominent spine, and the slight milky glaze over his eyes.

There were his eight years, after all. Maybe more.

At Montauk, he could swim, if he wanted to, though Karl never did. It was good exercise for older dogs, she had read.

Buzz’s head whipped up. Marian followed his gaze. Behind her, just outside the fence, stood a girl. His girl.

In less than a second, he was pawing at the gate. The girl opened it, and Buzz flew to her, nearly knocking her flat.

A volunteer hurried over. “You OK?”

Buzz had sat the girl on the ground to wash her face. “I’m here,” she said, laughing and crying simultaneously, “to get my dog.”

Married to Brian, Marian had lost a fair amount of hearing. This came from attending all his concerts in a futile effort to prevent him from picking up groupies. Later, married to Joel, the losses had been less permanent — her savings, her credit, the jewelry he’d pawned. Over the years, she had recovered those and more.

Most losses, in fact, could be recovered. Even the hearing she had somewhat restored by developing the ability to read minds. Not telepathy, just observation. Expressions. Gestures. The smallest things could say a lot.

While the girl and the shelter manager spoke, Marian sat outside the office, listening to their faces. The manager felt the girl was lying about having found a job overnight. And about how she could afford to pay the fee that the shelter would require, out of her savings. The girl in fact was lying. She needed the dog. With Buzz, she would find a way to make it. It had been a panicky mistake to give him up.

In the confusion earlier, someone had handed Buzz’s leash to Marian. Beside her now, he quivered. He panted in short, anxious bursts. Everything in him attuned to the girl, waiting. The manager studied the girl, too. Then she looked at Marian.

Some losses, you couldn’t recover. Not love. Too delicate. Prone to all manner of injury.

Not deaths. Those were permanent. There would never be another Karl. And he, Marian decided, would be her last big dog.

At the front door of the shelter, Marian watched Buzz’s mincing steps through the rain and the parking lot puddles. He wouldn’t have wanted to swim at Montauk.

He leaped into the girl’s battered sedan. The girl dried him with a towel, then used it on herself, and got in beside him.

The rain kept up. Dogs came and went — volunteers exercising them, filling the lobby with the smell of damp fur. None of them small. But some not very big. One put a warm muzzle in her palm and wet paws on her knee.

After the girl drove away, Marian found a chair. She opened her purse.

To fit her check into the jar under that sappy sign, she had to fold it up. The slot wasn’t big enough, having been made only for small change.

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This article first appeared in The Bark,
Issue 62: Nov/Dec 2010
Katerina Lorenzatos Makris is the author of 17 novels, numerous magazine and newspaper articles, and Your Adopted Dog (with Shelley Frost). She writes about animals and the environment for AnimalBeat.org.
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Submitted by Catherine | March 24 2011 |

What a beautiful story it brought a few tears of sadness and happiness all together, I really Loved and enjoyed reading Small Change.

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