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Letter to an Adoptable Dog
Dear Adoptable Dog: Please find attached my curriculum vitae, submitted for consideration for the position as your person. As you can see from my history, I have a lengthy and proven track record of excellence and responsibility in all aspects of pet worship. I can provide documentation in the form of photo albums, memorial stones, clothes with muddy paw-print stains and memories etched in my heart. I am not only hard-working and have a great sense of humor, I firmly believe in three things: bringing home a fresh-roasted, grocery-store chicken every week (yes, the kind you will smell before I round the last corner); giving you your bedding right out of the dryer when it’s at its warmest and fluffiest; and finally (my most fervently held belief when it comes to dogs), never talking on a cell phone while walking a dog. I hope you will consider me for the position. Sincerely, |
Qualifications:This article first appeared in The Bark,
Issue 75: Fall 2013
Illustration by Hiranonsa
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I understand why this was chosen as the winner...it's wonderful. Beautifully written with humour, but brimming over with love of the dog. I enjoyed it very much.
My stepmother used to cook hamburger for her 2 dogs every morning; we humans, including her, made do with cold cereal. For some reason, my stepmother became upset when she heard my sister say to me, "When I die, I want to come back as one of Sally's dog."
After reading this article, I know whose dog I want to be after my own reincarnation!
That is wonderfully written and speaks to all of who are avid dog lovers. Thank you.
It was wonderful (my face aches from smiling so hard and so long) to read about your love for dogs, Elaine! I began my Walk of Love in July 2012 with a little rescue I named Tika. You wrote so much about what I can relate to. Especially the warm bedding -- she has a particularly sweet expression when I bury her in that warmth (planned to happen right after her Sunday bath!). Thanks for the love....