A dog named Max licked my toe.
Why he did it, I don’t know,
He stood right there with his tongue stickin out,
Eyeing my foot through his long, thin snout,
Walked over to me and he took a seat,
Looked in my eyes and then at my feet,
Thought about it, took a good look around,
Put his head down, stared at the ground,
A minute went by as he thought what to do,
Then stuck out his tongue and he licked you know who.
If you’ve ever been licked by a dog on your toe,
What I’m going to tell you, you already know,
A dog’s tongue is wet, it’s slippery, it’s slimy,
So there’s no way a dog could just slip a lick by me,
I definitely felt it, the whole slobbery ick,
I knew that it happened, although it was quick,
I looked down at my feet and one toe was all wet,
And Max, Max the dog, just looked up, no regret.
He didn’t mind that he slimed me all up,
He cocked his head and this cute little pup,
Looked at me in a way that just made my heart melt,
So down on the ground I bent and I knelt,
And I patted his little gold head with my hand,
And he waited for me to give him a command,
So I said “Max please sit, please sit right next to me”
And he sat right there, put his head by my knee
The sign on his vest said “I’m Max, want to play?”
It said “I’m a good dog, adopt me today”,
One look at that vest, one look in those eyes,
Now you know the end, it won’t be a surprise,
Max came home with me, he’s the best dog around,
And the best dog around’s one you get at the pound,
There’s wonderful dogs whether black, gold or brown,
There’s probably a Max that’s right here in your town.
A dog that hopes to be loved by just you,
So go to the shelter and get a Max too,
One last thing on Max, and I write with a snicker,
Some things never change, he still can’t hold his licker.